Be honest – which would you rather do: Choose what your four-year-old is going to wear after his shower, or let him pick his clothes? For most moms, the former would be the easiest, for it saves time and of course, you’ll omit the possibility that he’ll pick out something not quite suitable for the day.
Little do we realise though, that there is a whole lot of benefits of allowing little ones to decide these little things for themselves.
What’s best for them?
We get it, that all moms ever want is to make life simple and easy. That means making decisions and then imposing those decisions on our little ones. We want the best for our children and, oftentimes, we believe our choices are what’s best.
At the end of the day though, this does not allow them to feel empowered or prepare them for adulthood. The power of a small choice can go a long way. The choice can be as simple as allowing them to choose which snack to take along to the park, or as mentioned earlier, what to wear. After all, if it comes down to it, you could always ensure that they choose among your pre-picked selection. The key is to enable your child to make some choices while still keeping your household routine intact.
And what do you get out of this? Plenty!
Teach responsibility
Life is defined by the choices we make, and we must equip our children by teaching decision-making skills starting at a young age. By building small choices into the daily routine, you are teaching your child to be an active part of the decision-making process and allowing them to learn to manage both decisions and their outcomes (whether those outcomes are desired or not).
Cultivate a sense of value
Making one’s child feel valued is one aspect that parents either go over the top on or just overlook. Children have their unique perspectives and each choice a child makes has as much value as an adult’s. We want to make sure that our children know that we recognize that and acknowledge the value that they add to the family. Recognizing their small choices is an easy way to empower our children and acknowledge their worth.
Foster creativity
Part of our parenting job is to take good care of our young and keep them safe and happy. To do that, needless to say, we’re going to have to decide decision on things pertaining to all that. The thing is, when we keep on making every decision for our children, we unwittingly shut down their creativity by being authoritative. Hence, they don’t get the opportunity to use their creativity and develop abstract thinking. Kids are naturally creative, but their creative skills need nurturing, and allowing them to make choices and following up on those choices to make them work will help them along.
They’ll learn to make better decisions
Not all decisions your child makes will have a positive outcome, and when a decision comes with an undesired response, through your gentle and kind guidance, your child will learn and consequently choose differently the next time. For instance, if your little one chooses to wear a white shirt on an outing to the park, and stains it, he’ll know better next time and choose accordingly.
Lets them feel confident
Being allowed to make their own choices, followed by kind remarks from their parents on those choices, will inevitably help little ones feel more confident in their ability to choose well. When this continues to take place, they’ll more likely to grow up with positive decision-making skills that will benefit them throughout their lifetime.
Avoid tantrums
Even as adults, tantrums often happen due to lack of control – it’s a lousy feeling when you don’t seem to have control over something that means a lot to you. It’s a natural human thing and we often fail to recognize that children also need to feel in control. Letting children make their own choices in things that matter to them will help provide them with a sense of control. Most parents also do not realise that they too have power when their child feels powerful.
It may be hard to recall if we were given many choices to make while growing up, but as parents ourselves today, it’s our job to develop our little ones into the best versions of themselves. That means allowing them their space to be creative and being responsive to their wants and needs. Letting them make choices in their lives helps, so go ahead and make his day – let them pick something out by himself
